Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
22 Aug 2004 Felicia People who are uneducated are about as normal as an educated person. One has papers and the other is without.
We can go on with definitions of any single word, especially words that may seem derogatory.
Now, we wouldn’t go to East Palo Alto, California and yell out the “N” word (which I will not mention!) In an African American community, or shout out “F” words whether it be one or two syllables in a gay community or any other public place in East Los Angeles, California or the New York, Bronx.

There’s also a difference between being book smart and having common sense (street smarts). Common sense is preventing a 45-caliber pistol gun from being aimed between the eyes.
08 May 2004 Felicia The Great Hello Mouchette, Lucy Cortina, Billy the Weeping Freak, and all the new members...

I have been on hiatus. I really apologize for not coming on this site as often as I should.

But I have a poem for you guys that would give you a thought to ponder.

"An Empty Heart is Filled"
By Felicia A. Floresca

"There is only one way to fill your empty heart. The only way to fill your empty heart is to have LOVE FOR LIFE.
Without LOVE for this ONE LIFE, you feel that nothing around you exists.

You have to realize that each portion of your life, whether good or bad, is a gift in which TIME can no longer take away from you and all this leads to happy or sad memories.

We must allow ourselves by remember this...

...that allowing ourselves by remembering that LOVE FOR LIFE is the epiphany for living for EXISTENCE."

Hang in there folks because "Today is the first day of the rest of your life."
10 Mar 2004 Felicia The Great Bringing Out Your Voice

By Felicia the Great of Course

It never hurts to bring out your voice unto paper. It hurts sometimes to have writing critiqued by others. Some opinions hurt and others don't. One example: The government may seem to live in hypocrisy; As fact, most politicians are labeled corrupt while other politicians are truly honest, and the honest politicians are usually the ones who get "mud slingered".

...As for the human condition, it hurts when an idea is rejected, and that can be the most devastating. That is why "wannabe" fiction writers, such as I, remain desensitized to publisher rejection letters. I got so used to rejection letters. By overcoming them, I put them in a file under: "Things That I Attempted to Accomplish and Failingly Succeeded" is a site to post feelings, opinions, jokes and rumors. It is meant to entertain, to amuse, advise, and last but not least, consider suggestive suicide ideas both bad and good (though I advise others not to kill themselves).

The human mind is a sponge that can grasp so much information in one setting and for those who express their opinions are truly strong to their convictions. Whether negative or positive, opinions make the world go round. Words do have an impact on the human psyche (mind).

My suggestion to all the readers, young or old, in this site, I have to assume are all suicidal. Yes, including me. I was suicidal once, but some things do change. Some days are worse than others and I occasionally have my ups and downs. Since life is the key to all existence, we have to be aware that down the road there are going to be obstacles. We have to face these tribulations head on to be stronger individuals. Without pain, how can we learn? Without suffering, how can we perservere (continue in spite of difficulty)?

Please feel free to express your thoughts and opinions to this website, even if it doesn't make sense.

And furthermore as courteous advise...

There are enough "Beyonce Knowles" with wonderful singing talent in this world, who grab too much of the spotlight over other musicians. Let the other musicians be heard.

I heed this advise to myself as well.

Continue on everybody, don't be shy. Remember after reading this post do not hurt, maim, or kill yourself. Old age will do it for you, so enjoy life, perservere, and live it to the fullest.
13 Feb 2004 Felicia I know the world is not making it easy to "us" writers or comedians. Rejection letters is like salt added to a wound. Writing poetry can make you think that you are in complete paradox. You drink a bottle of wine and spill it on your white shirt. You later lift it up to expose your hairy navel... you pick out the lint to see if there is any change left for lunch money. Your nose starts to itch. You get your index finger to scratch out last week's booger on the side of your left nostril.

But to be honest, writing is a lot like therapy. Even the average paid shrink says so. You can write or type in your journal and create a dialogue:

Q: So how are you doing, Gertrude?
A: I’m doing okay I guess? I am thinking of a “plot” at the moment.
Q: Is it a burial “plot”?
A: No, no, no!!! I’m thinking of a “plot” for my fiction novel.
Q: You don’t sound positive right now.
A: I just received a rejection letter from “Michael Meltzer Productions”. They said my scripts were not acceptable. So yes, I’m a bit disappointed.
Q: What are you doing about it?
A: Looking for more publishers and script agencies. Well, it beats sitting in front of the television set, watching Simon Cowell talk crap to all the contestants on “American Idol”. Besides, rejection along with humility builds character.
Q: That’s good! At least you’re doing something about it.
A: You’re right… oh by the way… where is your mother and boyfriend and why is your car, with the fogged up windows, moving?
18 Jan 2004 Felicia born in the year of the Monkey I missed you Phil! I thought you were gone. But you didn't appear in my dreams, so I assumed you were still alive. As one of my all time favourite posts posters please feel free to email me. I'm laying on the bed wallowing on my back, gazing at my protruding tummy.

Hi Billy. My name is Felicia. "Lucy's" talked much of you because she has big boobies. To be quite honest, you are so funny! I had a blast reading about your overview on the "Mayan" civilization which involved crossed eyed babies with stones in the middle of their foreheads. I laughed so hard on both you and Lucy's comments, I almost busted a stitch and my guts almost fell all over the floor.

Hi Elaine. You have a nice name. Please don't give up visiting this site because people still do care. If you need a woman to woman talk I am right here. But don't worry. I'm not lesbian. I'm strickly dickly. Ask Lucy about me and she'll give you a good word about me.


Please get started in writing your book which is a bit interesting. I don't know how you do it, but you write pretty long... and that's a talent that should be well spent on a good novel.


For dealing with me and deleting my gripes on loud cultural shock music and my bouts with shock therapy. Yes, I am coming of age. And yes, I am born in the "Year of the Monkey" which begins January 22nd 2004.
21 Dec 2003 Felicia December 21st, 2003

My Mom decided to meet Elvis this morning at exactly 8:10 a.m. Pacific Time.

This is the saddest Christmas ever.
20 Dec 2003 Felicia Having A Bad Scare Day I just wrote to the guy of my dreams today. Though he is in a strainful marriage, and having it easy living in a marriage of convenience... it disturbs me. We have so much in common, but I am afraid to see him for fear of appearing in the show "Cheaters".
I could just imagine getting caught by his wife which is more scarier. But then, I know that it would be the easiest way to get myself killed.

The closest remedy to suicide, people is indeed jealousy!
17 Dec 2003 Felicia Ticked at the Music Industry THIS IS TO THE MUSIC INDUSTRY INFLUENCE

I've found that there are many teenagers entering this website. The fact that I am old, I'm still young at heart, I am old when it comes to computerized or some wannabe folklore rock or rap that's gone bad. Criminy though, please don't get me wrong, but it seems the music I hear on the radio is getting worst. And....the lyrics of suicide along with illicit sex incantations are enormous. Basically, you're starting to hear the word "Fuck" all the time and the sounds of human moaning. Its like Led Zeppelin or Jim Morrison on acid, a million times over. I mean GOD FORBID! You skater boys, no offense sweeties--please note that I love humankind's well being, blast them earphones so damn loud, it's enough to give me a headache in a six feet distance or whatever.

In a nutshell, music nowadays, will make anybody.... just anybody want to commit suicide!

Do I make myself clear?

If I were you, please lower the volume, limit the negative music to positive lyrics, and read a book or go outside, surf skate, have sex, without the music blasting those freakin profanities, within a 6-mile radius.

And you damn top head music promoters condone it! What's the matter with you! If you guys wonder why kids become worst is "BECAUSE (YOU FREAKING ) LET THEM HEAR THEM!!! And now that this is the only music playing nowadays because you ALLOW it, the kids have come accustomed to it, and I have to hear it at work against my will!!!! Don't you know that if you keep doing this, all teens or kids will grow up to only "CUSS, FIGHT, AND BREED!!!" What kind of President will we have in the future…YES….Osama Bin Laden, that BASTARD, will seem like a saint for goodness sake.

GOD! Even American Idol won't condone it. Simon, though everybody says he's asshole, it absolutely right on the nose! If these so called Musicians were to perform in front of Simon, he would say,

"That was ABSOLUTELY horrible!!!!!!"

For Christmas, I am going to buy all you music top head honchos, a American Idol Simon doll, set a spell on it to say insults, and it can haunt you like Linda Blair from the Exorcist!
30 Sep 2003 Felicia in Paradox There’s writers’ popping out everywhere. It's all beginning to make sense to me now. They (the people of this website mind you) should name a different name. Apparently, this site kind of reminds me of high school "Shakespearean" times, when minds were fresh, the young were experimental, and contemplating suicide was only a recreational hobby.
27 Sep 2003 Felicia I did see Lucy Cortina on the Tranny website. My GAWD! The boobs look so real. And they are bigger than mine.

Shall I trade for some new ones?
24 Sep 2003 Leanne2Will You know, the main thing I hate about England is how hard it is to get hold of a gun... not actually ''get hold'' of it, but to purchase one. WILL, my lil pea in a pod, you've been away from this world for quite a while but your still surviving and you came back, do you take pride in that? For me it's a shame I'm still here.. it saddens me but it saddens me to give in. But to give in is to be free. The way I look at this whole thing, is I imagine Depression and Suicide is actually in the form of a human being and I'm constantly at battle with em'. If I let em' win, I lose, but does that mean that losing is defeat if I give in and take my life? Or if I keep fighting and still continue my exisitence being miserable, I'm losing and I'm still being defeated? I guess I'm screwed either way even if I do give in to the pain. This place is not like it used to be. I mean, it still has its attraction but where have the main contenders gone? i.e Just a Girl, Miss Lucy (I don't think I need to type her second name), Felicia, Naomi, Molly? These names will go down in history, I'm gonna make sure of it. C'mon ladies, we need you. For those of you who've been here since the dawn of time will know who I'm talking about. It's wonderful to see we have the other games' contenders here though,i.e Gay punk, WILL, Chris, oh and others who I can't recall right at this moment due to sleep deprivation. Mouchette, bring these girls back, even you must have noticed the 'zest' has left from here since their departures... we're all missin' them. That's all I ask of, today.' 'Until next time, take of yourselves, and each other!'' Cheerio peeps.
19 Sep 2003 Felicia True useful facts:

1.) The majority of the world uses and abuses some type of drug. The number one drug in this world that is used most is caffeine. Not to forget, it’s legal.

2.) Suicides result from the impact of heartbreak and grief. Some people believe that it is all in one’s head. No it’s not! Suicide is caused by the result of unexplained circumstances beyond somebody’s control. It can be chemically and mentally induced. The best prevention against suicide is to communicate.

3.) In the world today, most crimes are caused by misunderstandings that often involve conflict of religions or strong beliefs.

4.) Prejudice is a preconceived idea that leads to hatred. The same goes for discrimination and bigotry.

5.) It confuses me that some religions tolerate some notion of living in peace with one another and later turn around stoning somebody because they were different. This does not portray love and obedience in making things right under their god’s eyes. It’s manipulation.

6.) It’s a fact that what goes around comes around happens constantly. If you have revenge on someone, it comes back threefold. Later down the road you say to yourself that pay back is indeed a bitch and that is not good.

7.) Never manipulate or force anybody to love you. If they chose to leave, it is their will and decision. If you try to manipulate and force anybody into loving you against their will, it can only lead to one outcome… and that would be a recipe for disaster, along with a restraining order.

8.) Loneliness can only be resolved by mingling with others, such as going outside to see the world, even if it is your own front or backyard. If you are mad at the world and see an injustice, don’t sit there and complain. Do something about it! Just make sure that it is not manifested into violence. Learn when to draw the line.

9.) If something hurts so much to the point that you are pining over it, get out of the situation. It would be like prodding your finger on a rusted nail and doing it ten more times, while you are screaming that it still hurts. Some people mutilate themselves for a living doing this. Bad gets to worst, make it a goal to be a stunt man or stuntwoman. You might as well get paid for it!

...Snuff boy and snuff girls, please leave yourselves out of this. This is a website to prevent suicide, not condone such behavior.

10.) Live like there is no tomorrow because today is the first day of the rest of your life.
15 Sep 2003 Felicia Lucy Cortina,
I am real. Real as you can ever be. Don't leave the world yet in such a dramatic fashion. I have been submitting manuscripts to publishers, which is more suicidal. All the coffee in the world does not make me a better writer. In fact, since my brain is empty, which is more often than usual, I can tell you that indeed I'm all flesh and bones here. If you are leaving for sure, be sure to email me. And Billy, if you know a few one liners, send more to make the world chuckle and laugh.

Lucy Cortina, please I don't know you, but all of us in Mouchette love you.
31 Aug 2003 Lucy Cortina I can't get away from it!
I'm on a special lesbian-detox, and what happens? I see Madonna snogging Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera on my mini portable battery operated TV last night.
It's all so disturbing to me. I reported Felicia last week and she got sent to a special home because she attempted to commit suicide after I told her I didn't love her. I might go in and see visit her now. I might take her a few copies of Housewives Without The Husband, to cheer her up.
And maybe a copy of the latest newspaper.
There's a lovely picture of Christina Aguilera turning up at the VMA awards, dressed as a pink feather duster.

That should cheer her up.
18 Jun 2003 Felicia On LIFE I soon discovered at age 13, life would begin at 18. At 18, after losing my virginity, I actually thought life in blissful matrimony would happen until I was 25. Ten years later I grew older and had a mind of my own, never married, never had any children, and went out with guys who decided to remain at the maturity level of13 years or younger who have no clue in reading books on better relationships and sex tips Though one can sure ace as fellow mastermind on Dungeons and Dragons, pretend in being some secret agent of a Matrix or governmental conspiracy, remain planted behind the boob tube, conquer video games, drool at porno flicks, guzzle down several bottles of Budweiser and reefers all in one shot…all in the presence of being taken cared of by a significant other, or their mommy. Oh yeah, dating a computer freak who downloads on newest movies never yet seen on film with a barely naked eye, only to be watched rather than waste matinee or evening price. You finally meet the right one and think the world of them, knowing that they are married. You thought they would be wonderful in bed, yet find that they are lousy, when they think that the second round is too soon, and actually found that foreplay was more on your court and you were the teaser. Then you reminisce on the 26 year old homeboy that kept pumping you till you were tired even trying, when you keep wondering where they get all that energy from, and the previous homebody before that who was only out for your buckaroos. Alas, you break it off for no apparent reason because you were starting to feel like an “A-hole’s Nancy”. Not to forget, the time you almost got busted with your pants down, smoking reefers with a guy nine years younger than you, and having your bum exposed to California Highway Patrol. Then you have a cavity search and the John’s look at your teeth thinking you are a crack addict, only finding out that you have calcium deficiency and you feel like a blithering idiot. A young cop folds his hands and rolls his eyes up his head stating, "Oh please! Stop your drama!" Then he looks at your chest. Then you get proposed to by a guy you feel most comfortable but not so in love with and you think about the married guy when you are doing the horizontal polka. Then you keep wondering about how the Osborne’s can have their daughter sing a re-hash of Madonna’s Papa don’t Preach.

And you contemplate committing suicide?

GAWD!!! I survived. If I can survive through all this shinola... then so can you.
14 Jun 2003 the gay punk hi just a girl. thank ?god? that i still have people like you to cling on to.

friday the 13th is such the shit. as i thought, hey, i'd smash my head in the toilet in remembrance of the elusive derrick, all of that was stopped.

the fucking guy was there.


i was like, shit, you fucker stop playing games with me, you don't exist. but he was there. and we sort of had this conversation (in a group of people, please don't hate me because i am popular in school, i am popular in school as a freak!) the coppers are still gonna take him away though, but that's for NEXT WEEK!!! oh, lucy, just a girl, and will, and felicia i am so happy!! i still had the chance to see him.

i didn't tell him that i loved him though.
06 Jun 2003 just a girl Happy Birthday Felicia... :)
04 Jun 2003 Felicia has a birthday but it was missed. Yesterday was my birthday. I did what any girl did. I read through the board of emails talking to my friends. I invited them all to my pool party two weeks ago, but nobody came. It was just another busy workday, I suppose. I told nobody at work because I did not want to reveal to them my age. Saddened as can be I was not only reminded about my old age, but then I started thinking of life, and how cruel it can be. Then I thought about the day, when I almost threw in the towel, and how it would help to recover by the help of a good friend, Thanks a million, Lucy!!! Though I wish that I can turn back the clock just once to my younger 21 year old self and piddle my life away on Lady Godiva Bon Bons. I figured a day at the health spa would do me the trick.
Folks... My birthday advice to everybody. It is a lonely, lonely world out there. Strive to be happy by treating yourself to the little things in this world that can make your life better, rather than dwell on the negative aspects of reasoning.

To all the techies out there:

We are not living in "The Matrix" for it is only fiction.
Life is what you make it and everyday is your birthday.
03 Jun 2003 Lucy Cortina A friend of mine was discussing with me last night, apart from "boobies", forms of suicide. She thinks that getting a gun and shooting yourself will work. Then she paused and said, "But won't you go to jail for attempting to murder... YOURSELF?!" Stupid, stupid, I know!
Then her mummy said "You would be locked up in a secure mental hospital".
So there's my answer, huh.

Oh Felicia, how I feel for you. But I won't be feeling for your boobies. It's always been said that the American population (bar actors/resses, popstars and TV presenters) are officially obese. Obese boobies, however, is a great thing. It's a pity that Icecream wasn't injected into them instead.
When I was anorexic and my arms got very thin, I just replied: "Missy Elliott sat on them!"
As for Billy, alas.
Face down chanting "...and then they hit me!" (meaning my.. er, 'bombs') in a pub is no doubt his current location.
21 May 2003 Felicia is dilly dallying Absent Minded me.

Ravishing through a tinker box full of sots I encounted an item that I have long forgotten... a box of macaroni with boobie shapes, weenies, and tiny butts. (No kidding!) And there will little bugs embedded on them. Ewwwwk! Gross! As I decided to toss them, into the garbage can they went. As I sashayed upstairs into the swimming pool, there were bugs, mosquitoes mind you everywhere! I screeched again as the varmints floated against the surface, awaiting to suck me dry. The heat beamed on the ground making the concrete hot to walk on. Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! As I skimmied down the stairs, like a scittish waif, away from the bugs and the rays in the background, Elton John's song "The Bitch is back" was lingering in the soundwaves of a small, small radio. Thank God for MP3's, I didn't need to change a song. My player played on a remote through an FM transmitter. Thank God for this neat technology.
Through the hot torrid heat of my Cabana, I finally stepped on a poor slug. How sad it is to step on such a slimey thing that siezes to live. The slug had no choise to contemplate its demise.

So it is the beginning of Spring.

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