What is the best way to commit suicide when you're under 13?

Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

Nom/email
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?

18 Nov 2000 Tez Get into a flame war with Jakob Nielsen. Then slowly die of boredom, though admittedly not in the artistic way brought on by continual exposure to Robert Bresson films.

17 Nov 2000 Brian Start smoking

17 Nov 2000 Jen Find a large sturdy rope. Tie one end around your neck. Tie the other around a ceiling fan. Stand on a large block of ice, play your favorite Gary Newman records... wait.

17 Nov 2000 Erika Let a pit bull maul you. Poke it with a stick until it gets mad. Then your parents could probably get money, too

17 Nov 2000 No-Doz Bukowski Do they have any air shows where you live? If you live anywhere near, like, an air force base that has air shows; you can hop the barrier surrounding one of the top-secret aircraft (like, anything with the word "Stealth" in it) and make a run for it. They will shoot your ass quick for that, son.

17 Nov 2000 aknad drink draino

17 Nov 2000 phooky Generally, it's best to slowly choke to death on a toy intended for 2-4 year olds. A Burger King Pokemon ball is ideal.

17 Nov 2000 deboute --going to belgium / aller en belgique

--living in africa or balkans / vivre en afrique ou dans les balkans.

--feeding the freaky javascript addict cat / nourrir le chat accro au javascript

17 Nov 2000 Eu4ia Walk in front of a bus.

(this is embarrasing for the human race, you know, and someone is probably going to raise a stink about it)

17 Nov 2000 Corey Knecht Good ol' fashioned semen poisoning, undeniably the funnyest way, profitable too!

17 Nov 2000 xaosdog Je crois que la meillure serait de: (1) devenir folle; (2) te rendre compte que la chose la plus precieuse du monde etait cachee dans ta cervelle; (3) demander aux champignon-gens de t'aider a la retrouver; (4) attendre le resultat inevitable.

17 Nov 2000 xaosdog The best way to kill yourself -- at any age -- is to do so on a scale that itself ranges from the nanoscopic to the grand. That is to say, in a manner that links macrocosm with micro.

More specifically, the best way is to: (1) replicate your consciousness in a myriad of instantiations; (2) spread the various exemplars of you out across all time and space, thinly; (3) begin to hunt and eat them; (4) (it won't be long before you become the hunted yourself!); (5) when only one consciousness remains, return to step one; (6) when the final n consciousness instantiations are all simultaneously destroyed you will be done, where n is an integer greater than one.

17 Nov 2000 jose eat too many nachos.

17 Nov 2000 pete Pick at your acne until it gets infected and you develop septicaemia.

11 Nov 2000 a cool person --1.well, it's obvious, spend all of your hard earned life savings on a big speaker system, papa roach cd, and a big ramp on top of the empire state building, blast "binge" by papa roach and launch your four wheeler, full speed right the fuck off of the empire state building, if at all possible get enough speed to hit the next building and then enjoy the ride down!
--2nd cool way to kill yourself.......... walk into school naked, with a gun, or knife, kill as many people as possible then kill yourself, simple and traditional, but it works great!
--3rd way.... invite everyone over to your house and when they all show up get on the roof with a gun and jump off, blast yourself in midair and as you leave your body. Everyone will be laughing and saying what a dumbass but who cares?
--last cool way to die. go parashooting without a parashoot
(while you are on weed)

10 Nov 2000 eggnest to think like an adult.

08 Nov 2000 kerQ Talk to your parents until they bore you to death.

07 Nov 2000 lily ça dépend... si tu as 13 ans et que tu veux te suicider, je peux toujours t'aider, mais si c'est juste par curiosité... top secret!
répond-moi

06 Nov 2000 Andrew Mix common household chlorine bleach with ammonia to produce chlorine gas...it is one of the weapons that was banned after WW1. If you are lucky you can take out your whole family that way. It fries your lungs from the inside. The death is horrible.

05 Nov 2000 charli playing with knives

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Date	Name/email Nom/email	What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13? Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
18 Nov 2000	Tez	Get into a flame war with Jakob Nielsen. Then slowly die of boredom, though admittedly not in the artistic way brought on by continual exposure to Robert Bresson films.
17 Nov 2000	Brian	Start smoking
17 Nov 2000	Jen	Find a large sturdy rope. Tie one end around your neck. Tie the other around a ceiling fan. Stand on a large block of ice, play your favorite Gary Newman records... wait.
17 Nov 2000	Erika	Let a pit bull maul you. Poke it with a stick until it gets mad. Then your parents could probably get money, too
17 Nov 2000	No-Doz Bukowski	Do they have any air shows where you live? If you live anywhere near, like, an air force base that has air shows; you can hop the barrier surrounding one of the top-secret aircraft (like, anything with the word "Stealth" in it) and make a run for it. They will shoot your ass quick for that, son.
17 Nov 2000	aknad	drink draino
17 Nov 2000	phooky	Generally, it's best to slowly choke to death on a toy intended for 2-4 year olds. A Burger King Pokemon ball is ideal.
17 Nov 2000	deboute	--going to belgium / aller en belgique --living in africa or balkans / vivre en afrique ou dans les balkans. --feeding the freaky javascript addict cat / nourrir le chat accro au javascript
17 Nov 2000	Eu4ia	Walk in front of a bus. (this is embarrasing for the human race, you know, and someone is probably going to raise a stink about it)
17 Nov 2000	Corey Knecht	Good ol' fashioned semen poisoning, undeniably the funnyest way, profitable too!
17 Nov 2000	xaosdog	Je crois que la meillure serait de: (1) devenir folle; (2) te rendre compte que la chose la plus precieuse du monde etait cachee dans ta cervelle; (3) demander aux champignon-gens de t'aider a la retrouver; (4) attendre le resultat inevitable.
17 Nov 2000	xaosdog	The best way to kill yourself -- at any age -- is to do so on a scale that itself ranges from the nanoscopic to the grand. That is to say, in a manner that links macrocosm with micro. More specifically, the best way is to: (1) replicate your consciousness in a myriad of instantiations; (2) spread the various exemplars of you out across all time and space, thinly; (3) begin to hunt and eat them; (4) (it won't be long before you become the hunted yourself!); (5) when only one consciousness remains, return to step one; (6) when the final n consciousness instantiations are all simultaneously destroyed you will be done, where n is an integer greater than one.
17 Nov 2000	jose	eat too many nachos.
17 Nov 2000	pete	Pick at your acne until it gets infected and you develop septicaemia.
11 Nov 2000	a cool person	--1.well, it's obvious, spend all of your hard earned life savings on a big speaker system, papa roach cd, and a big ramp on top of the empire state building, blast "binge" by papa roach and launch your four wheeler, full speed right the fuck off of the empire state building, if at all possible get enough speed to hit the next building and then enjoy the ride down! --2nd cool way to kill yourself.......... walk into school naked, with a gun, or knife, kill as many people as possible then kill yourself, simple and traditional, but it works great! --3rd way.... invite everyone over to your house and when they all show up get on the roof with a gun and jump off, blast yourself in midair and as you leave your body. Everyone will be laughing and saying what a dumbass but who cares? --last cool way to die. go parashooting without a parashoot (while you are on weed)
10 Nov 2000	eggnest	to think like an adult.
08 Nov 2000	kerQ	Talk to your parents until they bore you to death.
07 Nov 2000	lily	ça dépend... si tu as 13 ans et que tu veux te suicider, je peux toujours t'aider, mais si c'est juste par curiosité... top secret! répond-moi
06 Nov 2000	Andrew	Mix common household chlorine bleach with ammonia to produce chlorine gas...it is one of the weapons that was banned after WW1. If you are lucky you can take out your whole family that way. It fries your lungs from the inside. The death is horrible.
05 Nov 2000	charli	playing with knives