Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

Nom/email
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
25 Feb 2007   sum times people on here need to forgive themselves.
25 Feb 2007 baby_again Hi, i wrote a story and the date in the story is soon


Written: 02/09/2007


He left the office a 1:00 PM Thursday March 1, 2007. He had given his boss an excuse for his early departure. Something about an appointment. His thoughts were disconnected as to what had happened the past weeks. His thoughts were on the task at hand.
He followed through step by step, like a military man falling back on his training when all else fails. Sitting on the bench awaiting the bus he goes through it all in his head.

He boards the bus sitting in the front with his back pack on his lap. He fidgets nervously with the strap as he stares out the window. He's traveled this route many times before. But today was no ordinary day. Today was his thirtieth birthday.

The bus arrived at the YMCA. He slung his back pack over his shoulder. Upon exiting the bus he lit a cigarette. It was a bit windy so he had to flick the lighter a couple times before it was lit. When finished, he walks through the front doors. He shows his card to the receptionist who scans him in. They make idle chatter while she is handing the card back to him. Heading down the hallway towards the men's locker room he instead darts into a side room. This is a private unisex bathroom with toilet, sink and shower.

He sits his back pack on the floor. He walks over to the mirror and begins to unfasten the buttons on his work shirt. He pulls it off and throws it on the ground by the backpack. He looks in the mirror. He notices the scar on his chest. He stands there looking at his face. Not so long ago it looked vibrant and young. But now was beginning to show the signs of aging. His face looked worn and tired. His eyes seemed as hallow tunnels of darkness as he gazed deeper into the mirror. He was loosing himself in thought.

Turning on the water faucet he washes his hands. He then kneels in front of the back pack and begins pulling out its contents and laying them neatly in front of him. Baggie with marijuana, rolling papers, scissors, and a folded plastic trash bag. Then opening the bigger compartment he pulls out a pair of what look to be a pair of footed pajamas with tweetie bird on it. There is also a matching top with buttons.

He unwraps the folded trash bag and slides out two adult disposable diapers and sits them on top of the pajamas. He then opens a smaller pouch and pulls out a razor, shaving gel, a container of Johnson & Johnson's creamy baby oil and a pill bottle. There is also a tiny bottle of conditioner or hair dye.
He stands up and strips and throws his close into the now unfolded trash bag, and drops that bag into the trash bin. He then walks over to the shower and turns it on to warm the water.

He then collects the razor, and shaving gel from the pile of items. Closing the curtain he steps under the water. He spends a few minutes just enjoying the warmth. He then takes the gel and spreads it on his face. Then taking the razor in his hand, he proceeds to shave. After his face is smooth as silk, he lathers his chest and begins to shave

He then lifts his arms and lathers up his pits. He shaves the left, then the right. He then rinses in the faucet for a while longer. He takes the shaving gel and lather's his pubic area and then carefully begins to shave the mound, and the areas down
under. He continues this process, shaving even his legs. He stood there a moment looking down at himself to check for any missed spots. He then remembered his arms.

When he was finished he stood there with the curtain open dripping dry. He had not brought a towel. He glided his hands over his skin to brush off the water droplets to speed the process. Moments later he found himself standing before the mirror. This time he had a smile as he surveyed his handy work.

He took notice of his build. He had worked for months at weight training. But unlike most people, his arms were not big. However his chest was well defined. He made sure to push himself at working those muscles more than anything else. There was just something about that look.

He took the tiny bottle and rubbed it's contents in his hair. He had dark brown hair, which was short. This was changing his color to a light color. What he saw looking back at him seemed like a
stranger from a far off dream.

He bent down to pick up the J&J baby oil. He opened the container and squirted a dab on his hand. He rubbed it into his chest. The smell enveloped him and took him far away. He was back at the old house on the couch. He was being changed by his mother. The memory faded as quickly as it had come.

He began to frantically rub the baby oil into his skin in a vain attempt to conjure this elusive dream. Before it was all over he had rubbed a generous portion of this oil from his neck to his feet. He set the container on the sink. He then reaches into the
bottom of the back pack and pulls out a small container. He untwists the lid. He pulls out two suppositories. He then spreads his legs slightly and inserts them one at a time into his bottom.
He once again washed his hands. He then grabs one of the adult disposable diapers and begins to open it up and stretch it out a bit. He lays it on the floor. He sits down on it and lays back on the floor. Things were now seemingly automatic. He was moving through the steps now with no apprehension. He began to fasten the tapes alternating sides until it was snug.

He then repeats the process with the other diaper, putting it on over the other. He stands and begins to slide on the pajama bottoms. He feels much more comfortable now that his feet are not on the cold tile floor. Buttoning up the pajama tops he smiles catching his reflection again. He then empties the pill bottle's contents onto a little metal shelf beneath the mirror. There are pills of various colors and shapes.

He begins to sort them with his fingers. He contemplates weather he should take pills of a like color together, or just dump them all down his mouth in any old random order. He decides to
separate them. As he is fiddling around sorting out the pills he begins to feel the pressure in his bowels intensify. He reaches into the backpack and pulls out a flask of tequila, and then a 20oz bottle of blue power-aid. He begins to down the pills with
the tequila. Once all the pills are gone he throws the pill bottle in the trash.

He now begins to role the first of what would be three joints out of the marijuana baggie. He tossed the baggie in the trash when finished. He puts the three joints into the empty slots in his cigarette box. At this point the pressure is unbearable and he
hunches over slightly and lets nature run it's course. There he stood, a thirty year old, dressed as a toddler, diapers and all.
He sniffed for a second. The odor was not as strong as he had imagined it would be.

He took a piece of paper and wrote the words "blood thinner, muscle relaxant, sleeping pills, pain killers, laxatives. He slung the backpack over his shoulder and glanced in the mirror for one last look. All his old personal effects were in the
trash. All he was bringing with him was the backpack which now contained power aid, cigarettes and joints and a lighter. And perhaps a few other odds and ends.

He stepped out of the door and walked back to the desk. There were people all around the lobby. Laughter began at once. The lady at the desk noticed and was also joined in with the others laughing. There laughter seemed so distant. Or perhaps he was so distant from the very place he now stood. He slid the paper on the counter. She looked at it. He pulled open his back pack and removed a hunting knife and held it up for her to see.

A hush fell over the entire area. "You took those pills?" she asked. She was barely audible. "Open the door that leads outside to the pool." He said sternly while looking her in the eyes. She took her key ring and he walked behind her keeping the knife near
her. While they stood there at the door she was fumbling nervously with the keys. "I'm not going to hurt you." He said.

"Did you have an accident?" she asked while turning to face him.
She could obviously tell by the odor that he had soiled himself.
He didn't even entertain her question with a reply. She opened the door. He saw her cell phone clipped to her side. He quickly grabbed it. "I know how this goes. You'll call the police. I don't want them coming in with megaphones and such. So they can
talk to me on this number. Now go back to the desk and don't let anyone out here." He commanded. He stood on the other side of the door as she closed it.

He began to walk towards the deep end. There were two diving boards, one at a normal height, and another which was quite high.
At least 20 feet or so he figured. He climbed up the steps and walked the length of the board. He sat down with legs dangling over the edge. He took rope from his backpack and tied his feet together. He then retrieved one of the joints from his cigarette box and lit it.

He sat atop the board perched like a eagle with his eyes darting across the area in anticipation. The area was surrounded by a very high fence. This added to his feeling of security. He began to hear sirens in the distance drawing ever closer. They were like intruders come to steal his peace.

After finishing his first joint he then began to sip on the power-aid. He began to wet the diaper. He hadn't noticed it earlier, but he had already wet himself while relieving his bowels. This gave him a strange sense of comfort. He began to feel sleepy. He lit another joint. He had his cigarettes, lighter, cell phone and knife at his side and his back pack
behind him.

The police cruisers were parked and he saw four police officers at the fence yelling at him. He could not make it out. He picked up the cell phone and called the front desk. A man answered.
"Tell them to turn off the sirens and lights and stop yelling. I need peace and quiet." He said and then hung up. Moments later his order had reached whomever was in charge and they complied.

The cell phone rang. He answered it. "My name is Daniel Green from the police department. Sir why don't you come down and let's talk." The man said. "No, there's no talking. Just leave me alone. I want quiet and I want to be alone." He said as he threw
the phone into the pool.

He could hear the distant chatter of police radios. He knew time was short. He tried to move but was finding it difficult. He voided into his diaper again. He sparked his third joint and eagerly puffed on it. He was feeling so sleepy now. He slid down his pajama's to show his diaper. He then took the hunting knife out of it's sheath again and put it against his inner thigh on the left leg.

With one fluid motion he cut all the way through the artery. He then pulled the pants back up by leaning back. He then stabbed himself under the arm severing that artery as well. Blood poured
from his wounds. He began to feel heavy. He was in a dream state now. He saw that the police officers were through the door and onto the pool deck. There frenzied shouting and radio squelch was so distant now.

The dream took over the focus. "That's right, I remember now. I used to come to this pool as a child with my family. This pool has always been here. This pool has always been here." He was
ripped once again from this dream when he heard clanging of boots climbing the steps. He looked down into the crystal blew water.

It seemed so inviting. He inched himself closer to the edge. The pills were doing what he wanted. No pain, no clotting. He felt the board shake as an officer was almost upon him. "Mommy." He
whispered as he fell forward off of the high diving board. The free fall felt like slow motion. He smiled as the water was rushing up to greet him.

Splash! The pajamas immediately took on a heavy and clingy quality. The disposable diapers began absorbing the water which made them puff up. This felt so comforting. The water was so warm. He felt like he was being held. The bulk between his legs
was so secure. The weight of the fabric was so safe. He hit the bottom of the deep end. He rolled onto his back and crossed his right arm over his chest in an attempt to hug himself.

His eyes were looking up through the blurry blue which was now becoming red with his blood. There was a splash and a rippling of the water. "They're coming to steal me away" he thought. He realized he was still holding his breath but that would not last much longer. He began to breathe in water through his mouth. He previously imagined this to be quite painful and scary. Somehow he couldn't feel anything but warmth and peace.

His body began to twitch and shake. "Air is for the living." A voice said from within him. He stopped shaking. He became one with the water, not being able to feel where his skin and clothing ended, and where the water began. All was dark.

"Sweetie, wake up." A soft voice said. His eye's fluttered open.
The light poured in through the windows illuminating the entire room. He felt himself being picked up and carried. "It's ok baby. Mommy's here now." As they passed a mirror he stared in total
disbelief. There he saw his reflection looking back at him. Only now he was a little girl with curly blonde hair, dressed in a pink baby sleeper. The entire room became engulfed in white light. "The transformation is complete." A man's voice came from the mirror.

The End.


All i want is ot be a baby again to be care free to be lovedto be a girl not a boy.

3/1/2007 is my 30'th

I wanna go home.
24 Feb 2007 DONT DO IT! I have though about commiting suicide many times. My life is pretty horrible because I only got two good friends. But one of them everyone hates. It is pretty hard. I was only suicidal for about 1 year. My cousin commit suicide when he was 23, because his gf broke up with him and they were going out since the 8th grade. He got caught with many DWI's and she said if you get 1 more, were done. Well he did get one more, and they broke up. The next day he was moving out of her house to go back with his parents. His friend left for work, he came back to the house about 10 minutes later because he forgot something. There he was swinging dead, if he woulda been there 30 seconds earlier, he would still be alive. When he was in the casket, his family was sooooo sad (obviously). I can guarentee that he regrets commiting suicide now. But he can't return back to earth as a person, only as a soul. I can guaruntee that people who commit suicide regret it in the long run. When I saw him in the casket, I wanted to commit suicide also, it kind of inspired me. I hate my brother, he always calls me a fat fucker. He always calls me gay, and he means it. It pisses me off really bad. That was when I was suicidal. It's been probably a year since I seriously thought about suicide. I was planing on carrying it out and I was planning on how I would do it. I got deep into thought and started crying a lot. I couldn't stop. I was thinking about my little cousin and how I wanted to influence her on how to grow up. DONT COMMIT SUICIDE. Think about it, imagine yourself being in a casket, with everyone who sincerly loved you enough to drive to your wake and mourn you, it's not the way out. Just wait... for all you people who think about suicide, DONT DO IT... it gets better. For all you people who contradict what I just said, your taking it to hard on yourself. Your parents are soooo sad when your laying dead in the casket. ITS NOT THE WAY OUT!!! If god wanted you dead, you never would have been born. Get fat and have a heart attack if you want to die, die a natural way, don't die by ending it yourself. You insane if you commit suicide and there is something going inside your head. Go to a doctor and get some help, it's not worth it and you got a whole life in front of you, you couldn't have the best life when your young, but you could become rich doing something stupid and have the happiest life. Just let life take its course and have fun in life while it lasts.
24 Feb 2007 dead inside. i only want to be loved. it sounds so simple, yet its nearly impossible.
24 Feb 2007 Dee just cut your self to death and slowly bleed and while your dying just say "Fuck all of you!!!!"
24 Feb 2007 Jackie Oh by living a life determined by others, by follwing THEIR rules and not floowing your heart.

you slowly die inside either way...

its so simple.
24 Feb 2007 Brett The best way for anyone to kill them selves is to pretend they don't have the power to change things in their lives. Everyone is sooooo much stronger inside than they give themselves credit for!!
24 Feb 2007 read ! hello,
i hope you got the time to read this.
im not going go on to long about this,
i came on hear to read why people would want to do this to there selfs and people who love them, im trying to understand the way you feel,
you may not think no one loves you but theres always someone that loves you, i no you might think know one cares but i can promise you there is always someone that cares,
i no you might feel like shit at the moment but you have your whole life ahead of you, you might meet someone later i life,
but just think ...??
23 Feb 2007 teaos its sad isnt it? how people and humanity in general can give up on life so quicky without even living it.simply because things go wrong people dont want to have to go through with it everyday there is no excuse for suicide there is no perfect way of suicide. no matter what life throws you try to deal with it. life can suck at times and some times it can be great. life is about struggle and adventue and overcoming those problems. i almost resorted to suicide once.. but i found my light i just hope everyone else can do the same..
23 Feb 2007 janelle Someone emailed me and stated that my entry could not help someone who is suicidal... she said that I should feel sorry for people who want to die. Believe me, I am very compassionate toward those people, but there is still so much truth to what I said. She says these people who read this stuff are reaching out for help. Once again, although it may be cruel, that's BULLSHIT!! Why go on the internet, go seek some fucking help. Ok, you may be embarrassed, but I'm pretty sure there is still school counselors, who can't tell your parents anything you say. And I'll always stick with my beliefs that if you were gonna do it, you'd just do it... no hesitations. And if you wanted help, or pity, or anything to that extent, you'd do it the right way... Thanx
23 Feb 2007 Fate's shoe Hey Vincent, you need to fix what you're talking about. The only Fates Hand I get is your post.
23 Feb 2007 Robert Firstly you all need to understand, that we where all born for a reason!!! and Life will always remain challenging. at some point WE NEED TO ACCEPT THE CHALLANGE!!! sometimes we need to look deeper into ourselves we are all stronger than we are able to realise.

IT IS NOT EASY, BUT IT CAN BE DONE... STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF IT DOES NOT HELP, STOP WORRING YOUR SELF, IT DOES NOT HELP YOU MUST HAVE NOTICED.

TIPS
========

PROBLEM
=======

NO ONE LOVES ME!!

solution
========
I will learn to Love my self and also learn to love others and add to their lives.

MY FAMILY HATES ME
==================
I WILL STOP ASKING FOR THIER LOVE AND START GIVING THEM MINE EVEN IF I HAVE NO MUCH TO GIVE.

I AM MENTALY ILL
================

THATS MY CHALLAENGE FOR MY LIFE I WILL MANAGE IT AS BEST S I CAN EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT IS NOT EASY.

I WANT TO COMMIT SUICIDE
========================
I AM PRECIOUS AND SPECIAL I WILL FIGHT BUT I CANNOT DO THIS ALONE - I NEED HELP, NOT TO SOLVE ALL MY PROBLEMS BUT THE HELP ME GO UNDERSTAND MY PROBLEM THOUGH LIFE, GROWING AND DEVELOP EMOTIONALY AND OTHERWISE.

REMEMBER OUR CHOICES AFFECT US IM MANY WAYS, YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO LIVE OR TO DIE TO FIGHT OR TO SURRENDER, IT IS BETTER TO LIVE AND FIGHT.

MY GREATEST EXPERIENCE
=======================
A MAN ONCE SAID TO ME THAT IF I CALLED THE NAME "GOD" 3 TIMES THAT HE WILL SURELY ANSWER ME, BUT I MUST CALL HIM FROM THE DEPTS OF MY HEART. I DID AND HE HEARD ME, HE HAS NOT TAKEN WAY ALL MY PROBLEMS, BUT HAVE MADE BE UNDERSTAND THAT I CAN TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME TO BE HAPPY AND TO MAKE THOSE AROUND ME HAPPY...I AM GROWING EVERY DAY.

TRY JESUS!!!! CALL HIM 3 TIMES FROM THE DEPT OF YOUR HEART CALL WITH WITH YOUR MOUTH...GO TO A FIELD WHERE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU SCREAM HIM NAME AND HE WILL HEAR YOU...LET ME KNOW WHAT HAPPEND I WILL LOVE TO TALK TO YOU.
22 Feb 2007 Jasmine I found this site looking for a way to help a friend. i think this is the sadist thing ever i read this one where the girl was pregnant and wanted to commit suicide. I just had a daughter 7 weeks ago she is the best thing in my life i look at her and think she is the best thing in my life the think to keep me going like no on else matters not even my self i would always put her first and on that same note i look at her and i hold her in my arms and she just coos and smiles at me as i talk to her i cant ever immagin her bing any age and thinking of ever commiting suicide how much that would tear me apart how we could have gone from being so close to her feeling her life isnt worth it how fighting to have a life or get away from the one she has in a healthy way i would always blame my self, and i think if i was a suicidal person thats what id want to make the person making me miserable to always blame them self, but what good is it if your not alive to watch it happen .
22 Feb 2007 Vincent You need help, you want to die? search "Fates Hand" on this site.
22 Feb 2007 Serena Well im not under 13 no more. I am 15 now. I am hear to say that suicide is not the answer. I know someone that loves "YOU" so much. He died on the cross for "YOUR SINS". His name is "JESUS CHRIST". He can help you!! Dont kill yourself. Thats a lie that satan is telling you. I you do commit suicide(which i pray you dont) you will go to hell. Hell is not fun and games. You are tortured and mocked there. I cant stress this enough "GIVE YOUR HEART TO GOD". We were put here on earth to praise God. And thanks to God i am still here. Yes i once wanted to die so bad. I have cut myself in the past. The pain was unberable. almost killed myself over 30 times. I almost cut my wrist to die, I almost used a gun several times, I almost drowned myself so many times, I almost swallowed many different types of pills, I almost sufficated myself. I even almost jumped off roofs really high up. The last time i tried was at church. Yes at church!! I was going to swallowed many different types of pills!! Oh i was so sure i was going to end it forsure! But i thank GOD for my pastors! They cared so much!! I felt so convicted to try to kill myself at church. everytime i tried God sent different people in my path, so it was hard to try. So i walked back out and talked to my pastor.. I got help. So we prayed and he listend to what i had to say!! And sometime you begin to think how come these people care for me so much?? So now im fine and living my life for God... You cant tell me God cant deliver you from something.. He can!!!!! He delivered me from this!!! What he does for one he can do for another. Just put your faith in God!!! Never give up!!
22 Feb 2007 TBS overdose on antidepressants....if that doesn't kill you i don't know what will. i call it irony....atleast my best friend laughed at my joke right before she killed herself. I was there. still funny right?
22 Feb 2007 dobby i dont the best way to kill your self but i need to know how. people think im happy but im not. my life has been screwed up since the day i've been born (with a few but rear happy moments)
im not at alll scared of my death, im lookin forward to that coz then my family would be happy agin, but im scared of the way. i just wanna die quickly and pain free. but i cant get hold of a gun and the drugs im my house r weak.
thankyou for helpin me out either by tellin me how do it, or tellin me to stop. i need all the help i can get.
21 Feb 2007 The Bitter End Corey - baby oil is not toxic or "irreversable", particularly when consumed. If it were toxic when consumed, it'd be toxic when rubbed into skin, just at a slower rate due to absorption. If it did happen to be toxic, I doubt it'd be advisable to rub it into a baby's skin, of all things. If you were to drink baby oil, chances are you'd just end up having a really lubed up shit in 2 - 6 hours. As for it being irreversable, no process other than waterproofing takes place, so no reverse is necessary, though if you wanted to lessen the effects of having drunk it you could just drink a glass of high concentrate Andrews Salts solution, or even swallow some charcoal powder. In very rare cases babies have died from baby oil getting into their lungs, presumably because their throats were not developed sufficiently to prevent this. Death in these cases most likely resulted from suffocation or pneumonia as opposed to any toxicity.

What I'm trying to say is try not to be so spectacularly wrong in public.
21 Feb 2007 Stephanie You don't. Even if it means runnning away from home and doing what it takes to survive. Call the police if someone in your life is really, seriously harming you. Death is not the answer, there's no coming back. Those dreams you have of the future are real.....Don't waste them on one phase of overwhelming depression. Get drunk, smoke pot. But DO NOT KILL yourself!!!!!!--Stephanie P.( a 17yr old black girl from Georgia)
21 Feb 2007 Slaswa Are you without pride..? Without pride in ourselves and what we do we are nothing but empty shells.. Having no pride in oneself leads to low-self confidence, low-self cofindence leads to depresion, depresion leads to more depression, more depression leads to hopelessness, hopelessness leads to more hoplessness, more hoplessness leads to an abyss of hell. Most poeple who spiral out of control to the abyss of hell don't survive. So if your hungry.. grab a snickers!

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